Milk Coupons 15.05.2006

i picked up a copy of Time magazine in gay paree where i met my folks.the article announced the demise of our world,this all occuring while i sipped on a cup of cawfee in a polystyrene cup.

on my return from gay paree i was well fortunate to have in my possession a ticket to the haloed ground of Old Trafford to watch the mighty Manchester United hopefuly make perogen outta middlesborough.lo and behold it didnt happen-RUUd RUUD, the limp dutchman missed a peanut that i coulda scored. but what a day it was,what a stadium.It runs with the efficiency and precision of a german saurkraut factory. it glows with this red halo, and has sprouted like a denny mushroom out of the sh*ttest part of the glorious city of manchester. sir matt busby watches over the inhabitants of manchester and down upon the 'city' fans. i sat south stand behind the dugout in and amongst a frikkin united nations of supporters. it was really surreal to see the footie stars ive only seen on tv-i nearly drowned them in my gob. although it was an absolute corker of a day ,what grilled my cheese to a burnt crisp was the lack of vocal support from the crowd where i perched.i mean i gave my best efforts but the feckers around just watched and ate hotdogs. so i figure United is a truelly globally supported team. but why do i support such a team?well wouldnt you if the company as a whole has a concern for our environment. they have separate bins for plastics bottles and paper rubbish. there are even wee slips of paper into which you can squash your bubble gum. now thats a team, an environmentally concerned football team.so to all you pommies who cant understand why i support such a great team,that is why.

so i bought the ticket to see the footie, but didnt even consider how i was to get there or back. it so happened that there were no trains that night after the football,so i crashed my silly a*s in picadilly train station for frikking 7 hours. now ive pulled all nighters in my wee life time. but staring at a clock and being watched by a bunch of degenerate half breeds on crack is not my idea of a pleasant, creative allnighter. by 5.30 in the morn i felt like a white washed pair of socks that had been on their owners feet for a gazillion kilometers and went straight to work.gsus what a day.

Beaulieu Motor museum( i actually had to ask the bird at the counter how to pronounce b-you-lee) is out in southhampton. its a museum housing a collection of vehicles owned by one uber rich lord montague. crikey its a sprawling behemoth of a piece of a land that this kid has organised himself. im sure every time his gran sent him to buy the bread and milk and told him he could keep the change,he hoarded those pennies, hoarded them like an oversized hairy squirrel on speed. the museum is quite phenomenal, and the cars that he hoardes are rather subliminal too. from back to the future's stainless steel delorian, to james bonds amphibious lotus. some day soon id like to pick up my cherry from her parent's home in one of 4 vehicles that i saw there.
vehicle number one. a vehicle that has surpassed all eras, nullified all fashion fads, left all other cars in its rip roaring wake-the shelby ac cobra is a gloriously beautiful ,aesthetically killing piece of shrapnel. i can see my cherry's family drooling all over it. vehicle number 2. the Ford GT40, a classic american svelte road chewing machine with its curvaceous lines and painted blue candy stripe. this vehicle would see my cherry hugging the car thinking it was me. vehicle number 3, the willy jeep, the willy jeep that rushed through vietnam, mowing down any Charlie in the glow of its rounded headlamps. it would need to be pre-sprayed in fake manure to give it that authentic feel. this vehicle would see my cherry's kid brother chewing on the 16inch 'takkies' thinking he was in a candy store. and then of course the wee orange car that' if it goes beyond 50miles per/hour,it tends to 'roll''. this one would see my future parents-in-law dis-own all their kids and take me as their adopted son.

cool house is a house that isnt decked in spanish roof tiles,precast concrete ionic columns bought in kyalami, bathrooms with gold coated taps, walls rendered in the 'aged' look or garden hedges cut in the shape of the venus de milo,thats what we call Tuscan sh*t. koolhaas, rather, is one of the greatest architects to walk this round planet and not fall off. Rem as id call him if i knew him personally is a dutch man and penned a book that altered the way architects think, analyze and conceive of their manifesto's. this was all done when he was a wee sapling at 28 years old. this dutchman is way huge. he presented his most famous piece of literature, Delirious New York to about 150 freaks commonly known as architects. he spoke for 1 hour and we clutched every word he uttered in his guttural accent. dutch,that certainly aint no language of lurv.
again i was inspired by a great architect

i jumped the jubilee line to a cd sale at wembley, not thee wembley stadium but rather a wee mangy little appendage that had perched itself in the shadow of the modern slick new Wembley Stadium. there were all sorts of music genres and all types of music formats , from cd to tape to vinyl. it was packed with weirdos that were in to musty old vinyls and japanese imports. i managed to splash out on 2 albums,Ash and Harry Connick,both set me back a whoppping total 2 squid rings, battered for extra flavour ( copyright: captain america).

anyhoo compadres, ive tried to pull out all stops on this one,but hey,the bath tub is empty
so hang tuf oh far flung ones.until another day.

sweetly the dan russian bear hunter,master swordsman and soon to be action figurine with biodegradable package to be environmentally friendly.